A feeling of anger turned into something regrettable.

 Photo courtesy: https://news.cornell.edu/stories/2018/05/woulda-coulda-shoulda-haunting-regret-failing-our-ideal-selves

How does anger turn you into a different person? I once got into a heated argument with my older sister, and even today I can clearly recall the incident as if it had happened yesterday. One peaceful evening inside our house, my sister, little brother, and I were watching a show on television in our living room while our father was in the bathroom and mother was in the kitchen preparing our dinner. One moment my brother, Mamay, prodded me out of the blue like I am confused while I was too immersed in the TV program, I became irritated and I look at him and said, “What? You look like a fool and useless.” Lea, our oldest sister, overheard that and became enraged with me for my behavior towards my brother. She said, “You spoke as if you had the right to say those words.” I also became enraged with her and said, “He is the reason for what I had said.” And she replied, “Take back what you said!) But I refused to take back what I said and said with a high tone, “No!” 

She was so angry at my response to her, and she beat me using with a towel over and over again, beat me three times with a towel since she was so upset by my actions. This made me furious even more. I became agitated as a result of that, I shoved her hard against our sofa, grabbed her by the neck and shoulders, and then punched her in the arms. She undoubtedly felt pain and started crying. When my mother discovered what I had done, she shouted at me and said, “Stop it! I said stop it!” but I refused to listen to my mother. My mother proceeded to call my father, who was at the time in the bathroom. She hurriedly went to my father to the bathroom and said, “Pa! LJ is hurting his older sister!” when my Father found out what I had done, my father was very angry to what I have done to my older sister. He hurriedly went out of the bathroom, marched straight to me, and punched me in the arms, slapped me in the face, and beat me on the head. I was somewhat taken aback when I realized that my father was still hitting me, so I hugged him out of fear that he would do something to me that is much worse than a punch and a slap he did. I was begging him to stop, I was crying while hugging him and begging and said, “Sorry, Pa!” then he stops and calm down. After that incident, when we were all more composed, my father talked to me and instructed me to make amends with my sister. I did as I was instructed to do and said to my older sister, “Sorry, Te.” I was crying and felt little embarrassed that time but I truly expressed my regret for what I had done, and my sister also felt wronged and expressed regret too and calmly said, “I am so sorry too”. We are both crying and admitting of what happened. At long last, we reconciled. With that we grow even closer to each other.

It was a time when my sister and I got into a big argument, but it was also a time when I realized a valuable lesson. I learned from that experience to treat my sister with respect and with consideration, not only because she is older than me but also because she is a woman. In addition, it taught me how to develop into a better person, a better sibling, and most importantly, as a better son.  I came to the conclusion that I needed to treat my parents with greater respect and kindness, so as to my older siblings. Following that, I learnt how to control my emotions, which helped me develop into a highly understanding person.

The events of that day were terrible, and they will always be in my memories along with regret, but I can also say that it taught me a lesson and helped me come to certain realizations. I already know that I will never act in the same way again, I learned to be more respectful to my parents and siblings, as it also taught me a lesson how to admit mistake, how to apologize and not be aggressive if mad, aggression will never be an excuse to hurt someone. The realizations I got from that incident will become my inspiration to become even better as a son, brother, and as a person wholly. We are not perfect, my family and I are pleased to be together. Even when I pass away, these learnings I got from my family will remain a priceless treasure in my possession.